tilthat:

TIL champagne corks, popped during celebrations, kill roughly 25 people every year.

via reddit.com

internetcrisis:

ladies and gentlemen, you’re now experiencing an emotional turbulence. please buckle up and relax; it will be over shortly. sorry for the discomfort you’re feeling and enjoy the rest of the journey called life. 

spacebumble:

emily brontë suggestion: be a recluse with a foul temper, wander the moors without a bonnet, shadowed by your mastiff dog, and be so eccentric the people of your village assume that, although you are the minister’s daughter, you are a particular kind of witch

veliseraptor:

when you can sense a Mood incoming and feel like a farmer standing in a field looking out at the horizon as the storm approaches like “looks like it’s gonna be a bad one, boys”

lmaonade:

people think just having your physical dick out is enough, you need to have your mental dick out too. and your spiritual dick? absolutely needs to be out. otherwise you’re just holding yourself back

winchesterprayers:

today in french we learned how to say “what’s in the bag” and i couldn’t stop laughing because

swaggity swag qu’est-ce qui dans le sac

sobeitjayt:

yep dont nobody want my boring ass