If you struggle with anxiety, overwhelm, or just plain feeling like a failure, I have a mantra for you that’s been really helping me out lately:
Just show up.
I used to skip class because the whole thing was so overwhelming: I had to get dressed in something clean even though I never had the energy to do laundry, walk to school, sit in class for up to three hours, plus pay attention, take notes, and participate in discussion. In reality, I was being a perfectionist, and life would have been a lot easier for me if I had Just Shown Up. By staying home because of my depression and anxiety, I wasn’t giving myself the chance to do any of that. I was such a perfectionist that being a “bad” or average student was unthinkable, so I stopped being a student at all.
If you’re having trouble getting something done, Just Show Up. You don’t have to be employee of the month. You don’t have to be valedictorian. Just Show Up.
ime it also helps to be like “you dont have to stay the whole time, you just have to go” bc most of the time once youre there it’s fine. a lot of things are like that, like… you dont have to finish the dishes, just start them. a lot of the time once you start a task it’s easier to finish than to stop, especially if you can trick yourself like “after five more minutes if i still feel bad i’ll go home” or “after washing two more dishes i can stop for today”
even if you don’t finish the task, you started it, and by completing part of it you lessened your future workload and ALSO taught your brain that things may not be as daunting as they seem
This is wisdom! Peace!
you know what years of therapy taught me – Redefine success
so what if no one else gets how the things you define as successes are victories because you have to
so you got to work – success
you used public transport – success
you went to the supermarket instead of ordering online and didn’t just buy things you dind’t want because you got scared – MASSIVE success
Redefine success, your body moved the goal posts, there is no shame in acknwoledging that
This may not help other people the way it helps me, so take it or leave it as needed, but:
A lot of the time, Big Epic Awesome Things are built up out of little tiny just showing up, too.
sit in the sun without anything to do, feel the heat of the rays hit your skin, realize that this sunlight has travelled a very long way to reach you
walk around barefoot and try to feel as much of the ground under your feet as you can, notice every rock and blade of grass
sit quietly for a while and notice the touch of breath in your nostrils, feel how the air gets cooler as you inhale and warmer as you exhale
drive around aimlessly and blast some of your favorite songs, scream/sing along to them and feel the vibrations of your favorite lyrics as they change the air in your throat and around you, feel that the music is healing you from the inside out
stay away from alcohol or drugs for a few days, try to be as aware and present as you can in every moment, stop trying to numb or dull your senses
eat a few meals without any distractions, notice every bite and taste every flavor that covers your tongue, be grateful for it all
look up at the stars and the moon, understand how small we all are and how immense the universe is, realize what a miracle everything is, let your heart swell with amazement and admiration for life itself
ok this is actually cool bc doing all of this is a technique called “mindful thinking” that is extremely useful for people with anxiety disorders and dissociation disorders and stuff!
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