the signs as lines from “the room”

chrisharrisonhands:

  • aries: leave your stupid comments in your pocket
  • taurus: oh hai mark
  • gemini: i already ordered a pizza
  • cancer: i got the results of the test back. i definitely have breast cancer.
  • leo: anyway, how is your sex life?
  • virgo: ha ha ha what a story, mark
  • libra: hai doggie
  • scorpio: you, you’re just a chicken. cheep cheep cheep cheep cheep!
  • sagittarius: oh hai, johnny. i didn’t know it was you. 
  • capricorn: everybody betrayed me! i’m fed up with this world!
  • aquarius: i’m tired, i’m wasted…i love you, darling!
  • pisces: YOU’RE TEARING ME APART, LISA