Aries: How to cope with having no friends
Taurus: 3 ways to join the mafia
Gemini: How to be a good telemarketer: 7 steps
Cancer: How to become a commercial pilot
Leo: How to wear orange lipstick
Virgo: How to make a baby laugh
Libra: How to model for Playboy
Scorpio: How to attract bats to your backyard
Sagittarius: How to fake your own death
Capricorn: How to pronounce ‘meme’
Aquarius: How to exorcise your house or dwelling
Pisces: How to breed beef cattle